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I have written musical comedies and dramas produced in NYC and Chicago, tv, a kids novel, a mess of commercials and even more IOUs. I won a Cable Ace for a Time Warner video of one of my plays.


I wrote the short story, Berzrk, as the first release of the Thumpers Chronicles which includes, novels, a play, a tv series, VR games, graphic novels, and films.


I hold my creative and pre-production sessions in Rudy’s Bar in Hells Kitchen, a hangout for Off-Broadway actors, writers, crew, musicians, hookers, Westies and other people your mother would not approve of.


I have a BA in Creative Writing from Purdue University known for Engineering and Animal Husbandry, which was not what I thought it was when I enrolled. I also has a degree from Hamburger University which has been way more valuable than my Creative Writing degree.


I live  in NYC with my Tasmanian Devil Dog, Davey and a dead dieffenbachia. I support ecological and feminist issues. My hobbies include over-eating, over-sleeping, watching Korean dramas, being walked by Davy, and every four years, I watch Olympic curling, the only spectator sport I don’t hate.


Back when T-Rex ruled the swamps, I was a copywriter, creative director, and marketing agency president.




John Patrick Gallagher 



A Short Story — Preview of the Thumpers Chronicles



“Berzrk” is a fast paced, compact, urban adventure.


Turquoise Thomlinson finds that the most exciting day of her life has become way too exciting. The NYU student gets her big break as a Lolly Po model for Fashion week. After her success on the runway (not falling down), she sneaks into a VIP party and is romanced by a hunky tv star. Unfortunately, Turquoise ends the evening hanging by her ankle from a water tower surrounded by groping hands. It leaves her nowhere to go but insane.


The Number 3 blasts through the night. Harlem bound. A flurry of trash rips through the air. Chaos in flashes of light. A war zone of paper and plastic. 


The Latin Kings hold court in the back end of the subway car. The young woman in the orange dress is not going to like their verdict.


Early September. Saturday. A couple of ticks after 3 am. The car is full. An eclectic potpourri of uptown and Harlem. All ages. Sleepy cleaners going home. College guys trying not to barf. Tired workmen. A nerd on his iPad. Couples of all ages. Partiers and clubbers. Complexions from black to light brown.

In the center of the car, Turquoise Tomlinson. In her own world. Rhianna in her ear buds. Turq is tall. Young. Beautiful. Painted into a fluorescent orange Lolly Po original worn for her Fashion Week gig. Décolletage nibbling the opal in her navel. Oblivious to the threat in the back of the car.


The threat. Four four members of the Almighty Latin King and Queen Nation. Decompressing after a tough night. Drinking. Drugging. Dancing. Trash-talking. Fighting. And pissing in the street. Everything but getting laid. Not good. If that happened too often, their pipes would clog. Immune system weaken. Jesus, Maria, and Judas! They could catch being gay.


They talk loudly. Laugh louder. Three standing wear Latin Kings colors and tats. One sits. Joél, El Cacique. Holds court. The others his jesters.


They haven’t noticed Turquoise… yet. 


Joys Of Revenge Therapy


A Novel

by John Patrick Gallagher

Release #1 in the Thumpers Chronicles


A case study of the therapeutic value of kicking ass, busting balls, and cracking heads in the treatment of female depression, utilizing techniques developed by Lisbeth Salander and Lizzie Borden.